Saints Peter and Paul Warming Center

Reflection on Metro-Detroit Relationships (August 2008)

Guest Essay (June 2008)

Relationships in Metro Detroit

Formation is a core value of the Saints Peter and Paul Warming Center.
Therefore, the Warming Center hosts seminars on topics of importance to its mission.
Previous seminars addressed the topics of addiction and recovery.
The most recent seminar explored the realities of metro-Detroit.
Linda Tomala, a member of the Warming Center’s Metro-Detroit Committee,
reflects on the meaning of the seminar.

The purpose of the Metro Detroit Seminar was to begin a process by which we can be drawn back into proper relationship with one another. By considering our roots and history, our experiences and relationships, we can closely examine how we think, what we believe and how we make the decisions we make each day. Through Ignatian principles, we can listen to one another’s stories, discover common ground and can be better neighbors to one another. Our willingness to witness the shaping of one another’s desires and to look beneath the surface of another’s life enables us to partner with Jesus in bringing about the kingdom of God.

The process is countercultural. We listen, without interruption, to another’s story. We contemplate what is said. We grow in awareness. We examine our own lives and do not seek to give advice or to direct another’s path. We are responsible for ourselves. We seek God’s desires for us by paying attention to the Holy Spirit’s movement in all things: events, conversations, encounters, the sharing of a meal, the beauty of nature, the tugs and nudges toward and away from people, places and things.

At this first meeting, one person shared a personal narrative that described particular childhood experiences, the feelings that arose from those experiences, questions that seemed important and the answers that shaped that person’s belief system. The speaker referred to the path he/she followed as a pilgrimage and spoke of a growing sense of something beyond what was literally going on in life. This person was open to looking at what was “not showing up in the picture,” but what was so important to understanding the situation. Sometimes the person was drawn deeper into tension, but ultimately experienced hope, consolation, and confirmation from God.

After the sharing, a moderator reviewed the highlights of the talk, pointing out key moments when God was active and the person responded. Next people were invited to share about their own experiences, again, one at a time, without interruption. A few individuals shared awarenesses, particular moments and significant insights.

The seminar closed with a group reflection based on the Ignatian Daily Faith-Awareness Exercise. During this time people quieted themselves and turned their attention to God, asking for light, wisdom and acceptance as they considered what had transpired in the seminar and their reactions to it. People silently expressed gratitude or regret and asked for God’s guidance in any change of heart that was necessary. At the conclusion, the group was invited to be open to God’s guidance and to ask God for strength and sensitivity in the rest of the day’s events and encounters.

This seminar was more about a way of proceeding than learning information. It was meant to be a springboard for a continuing process of authentic reconciliation. It offered us a way to examine where we are free and where we are not free. It asked participants to notice where God wants us to focus. Through this process, we can adjust how we see the world and reevaluate the current systems in place. We can ask ourselves, “How am I called to change?” When we are willing to ask ourselves this tough question, we can risk asking each other tough questions. We can accept and exercise responsibility. We can know Jesus more intimately, love Jesus more dearly, and follow him more closely. We can then see other people through a new lens, step into their territory and begin the healing process.

We’ve partaken of a small taste of the large feast that God offers us in the reconciliation process. At the end of the seminar, someone said, “We should do this more often.” We plan to and hope that you will come to the feast. (August 2008)

Guest Essay (June 2008)
"I choose not to use"

Today is the third time I’ve been to the Warming Center. I just learned about it a couple of weeks ago. Even though it takes me an hour to walk to the center, it’s worth it. It starts my day out perfectly. I can clear my head with the nice long walk and by the time I get a cup of coffee and have a doughnut I’m ready to try to find a job.

Finding a full time job has been harder than I thought. To keep a few bucks in my pocket, I work through these temporary agencies and get “day” work. The pay is decent, but there are no benefits. Plus, there are times when you show up on time and they don’t have work. In those cases, you sit there for a few hours and you’re not making any money. Recently I have been putting more time into filling out applications online on the computers at the Library. I have received a few call backs, and I know something will break for me soon. I just have to keep a positive attitude. No one wants to hire someone negative.

Well it’s been nearly a year since I’ve been clean of drugs and alcohol. Thank God! The drugs and alcohol made it easy to forget about my obligations. Made it easy for my boss to let me go. Made it easy for my landlord to throw me out.

I hit rock bottom last winter and FINALLY made the decision to change my life. After a successful stint in rehab that ended last August I’ve been clean. I feel so much better and for the first time I feel like I’m in control of my life. I know staying sober is a day to day thing, but I’m going to make. With God’s help, I wake up everyday and whisper to myself, “I choose not to use.”

A Men's Group Reflection
by Nick Sharkey,
Men’s Group facilitator and Warming Center staff person

When a group of men walk into a small conference room at the Warming Center every Monday morning, they are continuing an almost five centuries old Jesuit tradition of reflection and prayer.

Every meeting includes quiet time for reflection followed by a self-composed prayer. During the meeting the guests take part in the Ignatian Daily Exam which emphasizes being grateful for the many gifts we are given.

During the time for reflection the men walk through their lives for the past 24 hours. With gratitude to God, they recall from hour-to-hour, place-to-place and person-to-person the good parts of their lives.

As the men review their daily lives, they often thank God for the gift of life, for their health, for their families and for a place like the Warming Center where they can think about their lives today and where they want to go in the days ahead.

Then, they recall their feelings – positive and negative – that surfaced as they thought about their daily lives. They know that their feelings, the painful and the pleasing, signal where the action is in their day. By paying attention to the range of emotions they experience– rage, delight, shame, pride, optimism, depression, etc. – they discover the most important part of their day.

Emphasizing the emotions they experience in their daily lives unlocks the mystery of what makes them unique children of God. It helps them to find the hidden talents they have that make them distinct human beings. They often re-discover a passion for a vocation or a hobby that is hidden by the turmoil of their lives.

After this reflection time, most men offer up a simple prayer based on the strongest feelings they have just experienced. Prompted by their reflections, they often will ask for God’s assistance in helping them to make changes in their lives.

As they file out of the conference room after one hour, the men are more peaceful with themselves and confident of their abilities to face the challenges in their daily lives.